Not All Hearts Move On
by wordsdon'tcomeeasy
Summary: Years after her death, Kate Todd still watches over her old friends. When will she, if she ever will, move on and realize that they have done the same? Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS or any of it's characters.
1. This One Guy

Kate approached the floor mirror. Here, she could watch whatever she wanted on Earth. It had been years since her death, but she couldn't forget her team. She couldn't find it in her heart to move on.

She watched them from time to time. Kate couldn't help it. She'd try to walk away form it all, but she'd end up thinking about them and would run back to the mirror, just to catch one more glimpse.

She tells herself it'll be her last, but deep down, she knows it won't be.

Kate knelt down, sitting at the edge of the rather large mirror, looking down at the clouds below her. She closed her eyes, and wished for the person she wanted to see.

_Show me… Anthony DiNozzo._

She opened her eyes, looking down at the scene now below her.

**xxx**

Tony sat at his desk in NCIS headquarters, typing up a report on the last crime they had solved. He wasn't exactly concentrating however, constantly zoning out. Kate knew what she would have told him at the moment. _I'd tell him to stop imagining chicks and finish typing the report before the Director kills him._

A woman entered, sitting at what had been Kate's desk. Kate had learned quickly that the woman was named Ziva, and she had helped save Gibbs' life by shooting her own brother_. The man who had killed me._

Kate didn't hold anything against Ziva. In fact, she was glad that the boys treated her as one of their own.

Ziva approached Tony's desk, reading over his shoulder. She burst into laughter, and Tony rolled his eyes.

"What's so funny?"

"You did not rescue the day, Tony."

"Yeah, Ziva, I kind of did. I figured out where he was hiding." Ziva made a face.

"That was McGee."

Tony glared at her. "Give me a little credit here! I helped!"

"We all did."

She patted him on the shoulder, and walked back towards her desk.

"I did the most work!"

"Whatever happened to teamwork, Tony?"

He glared at her, and she raised her eyebrows.

_Just a typical day for these two._ Kate sighed, happy with this scene.


	2. No Longer a Probie

_Show me… Timothy McGee._

She closed her eyes again and waited several minutes. She needed to wait until McGee came into the scene, which should be in a few minutes.

To pass the time, she thought of when McGee had been promoted to full time special agent, and when Gibbs had become his official boss.

Her and Tony had given him a Gibbs slap, telling him to get used to it.

She smiled at the memory, and opened her eyes.

Kate looked down to find McGee walking to his desk, and Tony using his fingers to drum his desk. As McGee settled into his chair and turned on his computer. Tony forced a loud laugh to get their attention.

"Something caught in your throat, Tony?" He looked at Ziva, who was smirking.

"It's called laughing, Ziva. You should try it." He got up and walked over to McGee.

"You lied to Me, McGee." He looked up, feigning innocence.

"And what did I lie to you about Tony?"

"You said we were all going to go to the bar yesterday."

"No, I didn't. I didn't even mention a bar."

"Aha Elf Lord. You stood me up. You said everyone was going." He put his hands on McGee's desk, glaring at him. "I'm not dumb Tim."

"DiNutty, I didn't tell you that. You have to have me mixed up with someone else. I didn't even know we were all supposed to be going to a bar last night."

"Then who called me right after work telling me to head to the bar at 9?" McGee looked around Tony to where Ziva was shuffling papers, smiling slightly. Tony followed his gaze and Ziva looked up at them.

"What?"

Tony walked over to Ziva's desk, but Kate's eyes didn't follow him. Rather, she focused on Tim, who was watching them with an amused expression on his face.

Soon, his eyes were diverted back into his computer screen, and he began typing away.

She wished she could read his mind. Just to know what he was thinking. _Is he thinking about Tony and Ziva? Maybe what he's writing? What is he writing anyway?_

She moved the scene around so that she could focus on a close-up of McGee. On the computer screen was an open document, with McGee typing about going into a trailer. _Oh. He's writing about the last case. Just like Tony had been doing. As much as they used to bicker, they really can be alike. _

Kate thought back to when they were investigating a crime in a campground. He and Tim had been semi-fighting about McGee being able to figure things out himself. She and Tony had laughed before Runyon's interview; with them wondering what Gibbs would do if Runyon decided to relieve him self in the investigation room. _And Tony ended up having to clean it._

She laughed to herself. She missed those days, those small moments, that she couldn't get out of her head. Those moments played on repeat in her mind, like some sort of a movie that never seems to end.

"Oh, McGee."

She watched him send the report to the director, and close the document, saving it. He got up, and handed a coffee cup to Ziva.

"Thank you, McGee."

"Anytime."

"Hey! McGee! What about me?"


	3. A Wise Duck's Words

_Show me... Ducky._

Closing her eyes and opening them once more, she found herself looking down at Ducky. He was performing an autopsy, and his face was set deeply in concentration, as his assistance, whose name was determined by Kate a month or so after he began assisting Ducky, passed him the tools and supplies needed to finish the autopsy.

She missed Ducky a lot. More than anyone could guess. He had always been there for her. Whether is was when Tony had fallen deathly ill and everyone thought he was going to die, or the other countless times she had come to him for his opinion, for his help, for his guidance.

_For just a small, comforting word, full of knowledge and understanding. Sometimes I got just a plain little hello from him. But for some reason, I miss those too. Sometimes I got a long story about one of Ducky's experiences or another long fact that he had to elaborate on. Just to hear one more, once._ _Every time you entered the room he would launch into some sort of story, one that could be fascinating, yet one that can occasionally be a bit dull. _

As she watched him work, she wished that she could just waltz in there, asking him if he had found anything so that she could report back to Gibbs.

"Well, Mr. Palmer, it seems as though we may have quite a dilemma. It seems as though our young sailor doesn't have fingerprints."

"How is that, Doctor?"

"Well, the young man might have pricked his fingers and poured pineapple juice on them, erasing his marks."

"That doesn't sound very…comfortable."

"Indeed it is not. It is a very painful procedure."

The two continued to finish up the autopsy. Ducky started to close him up, but halfway, stopped and turned to Palmer.

"Mister Palmer, may you finish closing up our guest? I must speak with Miss Sciuto immediately."

"Of course, Doctor."

Kate's eyes followed him out the door. As soon as he left the room, her eyes swept it once more and closed them.


	4. A Father Figure

_Show me… Leroy Jethro Gibbs._

She opened her eyes, and found Gibbs in his basement. Kate smiled. He was almost always working on that boat of his. Of course the window would show her him in his basement.

He was hunched over it, a beer to his left and carving supplies to his right. He was carving into some small woodwork, which Kate already knew was going to eventually be the smaller, extra, more detailed parts of the boat.

_It's coming along quite well. It looks better than his other boats, actually. He must be getting better at it. Well, of course he is. All the man does is make boats and catch major criminals and terrorists._

Kate watched him for a while. She lost track of the time, so she wasn't sure how long Gibbs continued to work on the woodwork. It was amazing to her how patient he could be. She rarely ever got to see a patient Gibbs. _Does a patient Gibbs even exist?_ He wasn't getting very upset when his hand was misguided in a carving. Rather, he muttered a little and worked some more to fix it. He never lost his concentration, although he would take a rest every now and then to take a sip of his beer.

Gibbs' phone rang. Annoyed, he answered it, putting down his utensils.

"Gibbs."

The voice on the other end spoke. Kate couldn't hear the voice, but she knew it was probably pretty important. Most people knew better than to randomly call Gibbs just for their own perks. He listened to the voice, and without saying another word, Gibbs closed his phone, putting it back into his pocket, and grabbed his jacket; he left the house and jumped into the car.

_It must be a new case. _

He drove to the NCIS building, and quickly got himself a cup of coffee, heading for the elevator.

_Of course he bought pure, black coffee. His habits never really change, now do they?_

Gibbs exited the elevator, and headed straight for his desk, ignoring his still bickering team.

"Dead marine found on a naval base. Let's go."

Grabbing his gear, he got into the elevator, not waiting for his team as they scrambled to catch up with him.

Kate smiled. _He never changed. Not one bit. Even the way he announced their case stayed the same. I wonder if McGee is still spilling his coffee. He probably still does now and then. But it seems as though Gibbs has finally warmed up to him. _

_I wonder if Gibbs has added any more ex-wives to his list. I sure hope not._

_I just hope that his driving has improved a bit._

Kate closed her eyes again. _One last stop. _


	5. Inside Jokes

_Show me… Abigail Sciuto._

Kate kept her eyes closed longer than usual. She wanted to remember past memories first.

She thought of when she and Abby had made a deal to trick McGee out of 20 bucks. Abby had 'forced' her to put on a hat she had made, telling McGee secretly that she would bet him 20 bucks she could make Kate where it. McGee had lost, and they split the money.

Kate recalled the picture of Abby she had drawn one day. It had been Abby as a vampire bat. It hadn't been well drawn at all, but she had loved it nevertheless.

Kate also remembered all the times she and Abby had hung out after work, and how Abby had helped her with her dog, Tony. They had used DiNozzo's cap as a bowl when DiNozzo didn't buy one.

She missed that a lot. Having fun with Abby, playing around with her. She missed the whole team, sure, but she loved being around Abby. _At least she has Ziva now. It's good that they warmed up to each other. They both need each other more than they'll ever know. But I can't turn back time. If I could, I… I don't know if I would. They're happy. They seem incredibly happy. The team doesn't need me to be happy, they're adults. They move on. _

Kate smiled, and finally opened her eyes. Of course, Abby was in her lab, starting up all the machines. After all, it was only morning. She watched as she sat on one of her stools with wheels, pushing herself away from the evidence she had brought in to compare, holding two plastic bags.

Patiently, she observed as Abby compared the two strands of hair. She used microscopes, and then somehow had the image on the computer, using that to compare them somehow.

Kate wasn't sure how exactly this was all working, or what exactly Abby was doing_. Reasons why I wasn't a forensic scientist. This all looks so confusing. I feel like Gibbs when he's watching people use majorly advanced technology. _She laughed, remembering. Her eyes continued around the room, just to see the lab again. Eventually, they rested on Abby again, who was now talking to Ducky. He had brought her evidence to work on, and she was already getting to work.

"What, no Caf-Pow?"

Ducky laughed at her. "Sorry, Abigail. However, I believe Jethro will bring you all you can drink."

They both smiled, and Ducky left the room, leaving Abby to her work once more.

Kate watched her continue her work, more rapidly this time as she worked on several different pieces of evidence, most probably from different crimes as well. Kate didn't wait for Gibbs to come in. It was the same routine every time. Even if it didn't bore her, she didn't want to wait that long.

Quickly, she closed her eyes and opened them over and over, taking in all the important rooms in the building: the Director's office, the main floor, Abby's lab, the autopsy room, and the interrogation room.

Finishing her sweep, she sat back, keeping her eyes closed. Kate heard footsteps behind her. Out of habit, she responded the way she would have back at the agency.

"How may I help you, Director?"


	6. Moving On

With her eyes closed, Kate could only hear. She heard the Director sigh, and sit next to her.

"How many times do I have to tell you to call me Jenny, and not Director?"

"Sorry. It's a habit."

Kate grinned, and opened her eyes, turning her head to smile at Jenny. She wasn't smiling back.

"What is it?"

She didn't respond for a few minutes. Rather, she looked at Kate's eyes, watching her emotions.

"Di- Jenny…"

Finally, she spoke up. "How much linger are you going to torture yourself, Kate?"

Kate stiffened. _I'm not torturing myself. _

"What do you mean? I don't inflict any self harm."

Jenny rolled her eyes. "By torture I mean watching them. Why do you keep watching them? It's been years."

She looked down. She wasn't sure how to respond, and she certainly didn't want to give the wrong answer.

"I just… I guess… I guess I want to feel as though I'm still part of the team, you know? And I miss them to much. I can't walk away from the people that mean the world to me."

"But they don't know you're here. Kate, can't you see they've moved on? They'll always remember you; remember things you've done for them or with them. But they have to live their lives. They don't keep dwelling on the past. Especially when they can't change it. You should do the same." She paused for a breath. "It's not helping you to keep watching them. Move on."

"Not everyone can move on so quickly you know."

"I do know. It's difficult for me, too. I miss them just as much as you do. Don't you think I miss my usual banter with Jethro? Or secretly having a mission with DiNozzo? Or having McGee assist me in SECNAV? Because I do. I miss it just as much as you do. But I can't go back. I've realized that. They can't bring us back, even if they wanted to. They have the new director now, and they have Ziva."

Kate wiped a tear from her face. "I know, I know."

"They don't think about us the amount that we think about them. They have lives to deal with, people to see, people to date and in Jethro's case, possibly marry. We can't hold their hands. _They can't even see us._ They don't cry after us during the night, they don't miss us sitting at our desks. They did at one point. The team doesn't anymore. It's time to let go, Kate."

Jenny put her arm around her, letting Kate cry. She knew it was hard for her, but she also knew that even if Kate would never admit it, it hurt her to watch them. She wanted to be with them; she didn't want Ziva with them.

She wanted to tease DiNozzo, and pull pranks and such on McGee.

She hated watching as others got to do the things she longed to.

And Jenny understood that. The new director took her place. She wanted to be the one to glare Jethro down and scold him when he went against her will, even if he had been right.

But it could never be done. Kate needed to understand that.

After what seemed like hours of crying and thoughts, Kate straightened up.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. You love them. It's hard."

She nodded. _At least she understands._

"I think I'm finally ready. I cannot keep watching them. Ugh, I wish I could thank Ziva for everything she's done for them."

"You will, eventually. Possibly many, many, _many_ years from now, but eventually you will be able to tell her."

Kate laughed again. "With Tony by her side?"

"With Tony by her side."

Jenny stood up, and held out her hand. Kate took it, letting herself be helped to her feet. She would need a lot of help, and support. The two would be there for each other. They would be their own team.

They walked away from the floor mirror, and they never looked back.


End file.
